2009-08-22

The life re-edit



Act III of your life not going to plan? It's time to review your goals and rewrite your life direction.


You've spent ages working towards something, only now, you're beginning to question whether it's what you really want. Sound familiar? Whether it's relationship, career or self-related, there inevitably will come times when we suddenly pause, analyze the situation at hand and realise something's not quite right. Sometimes, we can even pinpoint what's caused the revelation (such as a job loss or unexpected relationship break-up): other times, it's not so clear. Either way, we shouldn't have to feel lost in our own feelings. There are ways to regain control and live the life that makes you happy.

1."What am I doing with my life"
It's normal to contemplate your direction in life - and happiness levels. Although most people strive for contentment and want to live a good and meaningful life, very few actually know what this would be like. As a result, many people, at some point feel lost and question what they're are doing and where they're going. There's much to be gained from these journeys of self-discovery. Questioning can be a very constructive process; you focus on the positives and best possible outcomes.

Contemplation usually arises following an unexpected change of plans - something we should learn to embrace. Change will happen whether we like it or not. Look for the good in every opportunity that present itself - you may even find that this 'scary' change is exactly what you need to move closer towards your goals.

2.Put your values first
In order to ponder of fearing the worst, you need to pay attention to your true values. Identify what's meaningful to you in life and these values will become a reference point. Values are 'compass point', rather than definite goals, and will give you an idea of what of what direction you should go in, regardless of what other circumstances are happening in your life. They'll also protect you from getting off-track and assuming someone else values as your own. For example , career may be important to your parents, but not so much to you, so learn to distinguish the difference.

It's hard to get anywhere in life if you're not clear about what you're trying to achieve. That said, you need to balance your optimism with reality. What we know about the happiest and most successful people is that they aim high and dream big, but they also face the cold, hard realities of the day - in a constructive way.

So, instead of lingering on a disappointment or failure, choose to view it as a tiny setback. Sure, it may take a little longer to get where you want to be, but trust that you'll get there because you want to.

3.Gear up your goals
Short-term versus long-term goals - which is better? They're both important! We need long-term goals so we have something to aim towards, but we also need to break these down into smaller, more achievable chunks. This way, we can ensure we're on the right road and gain important feedback and reinforcement a long the way.

Confidence usually comes from achieving things, so set yourself realistic goals, develop a plan to reach those targets, and do what you need to in a structured way. A lot of people expect too much too soon - they want it all and blame themselves if they find they can't achieve that. So focusing on only a few values at any one time is important.

Above all, don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself. As long as you feel satisfied your life is moving in a positive direction, then you're on the path to some serious happiness.

1 comment:

design traveller said...

I recommend taking Myers-Briggs personality test, great tool used by professional psychologists. It helped me to realize who I really am and set my goals according to my own values.